Confident Bitcoin Whales, #Surging Ethereum Validators, #Capturing Bitzlato and 20 Crypto #Jokes

She suffered sunburn, blisters and aches, and #jokes that she's now been bitten by every insect under the sun - ants, mosquitos, #spiders and more.

A weekly round-up of top #crypto news from #Cryptonews.com and a collection of 20 hand-picked crypto #jokes.

If I ever need a heart transplant, I’d want my ex’s. It’s never been used.#funny #jokes

It’s better to fail than to cheat but its better to cheat than to repeat.#funny #jokes

I’m too shy at first but once I’m comfortable with you, get ready for some crazy shit.#funny #jokes

The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.#funny #jokes

I follow the quote, “Always be true to yourself” because I only lie to others #funny #jokes

Dear problems… Please give me some discount… I’m your regular customer.#funny #jokes

If I won the award for laziness, I would send somebody to pick it up for me.#funny #jokes

I like when you smile, but I love it when I’m the reason.#funny #jokes

Hey, I’ll be back in five minutes. If I’m not, just read this message again.#funny #jokes

I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.#funny #jokes

Happiness is when ‘Last seen at’ changes to ‘Online’ and then to ‘Typing’.#funny #jokes

I hate people who steal my ideas before I think of them.#funny #jokes

I love my job only when I am on Holiday....... #funny #jokes

Fact: Ph. on silent mode- 10 Missed call. Turns volume to loud- Nobody calls all day.#funny #jokes

When your phone are 1% battery & anyone who sends a message, Or calling, Becomes the enemy #funny #jokes

Taking your ex back is like going to the junkyard and buying back your own crap.😅#funny #jokes

I don’t know why I keep a plastic bag at home full of plastic bags🙄🙄#funny #jokes

One wise guy invented Whatsapp… and his wife added last seen the feature ☺️☺️#funny #jokes

I work out every day I do 1 sit-up every morning when I wake up.🤭#funny #jokes

You’re beautiful until your Photoshop 30 day trial has gone.🤣#funny #jokes

My teacher today gave a 45-minute speech about not wasting time.#funny #jokes

3 horrible things in life: 1) Slow Internet. 2) Slow Internet. 3) Slow Internet 🙄#funny #jokes

I put my heart n soul into my work and lost my brain in the process😅#funny #jokes

Wants to know how the hell I can remember words to songs from years ago but can’t remember what I went into the next room for!!#funny #jokes

Faces you make on the toilet: (o_o), (>_<), (0_0), (^_^)🤭😅#funny #jokes

My secret talent is getting tired without doing anything.😁#funny #jokes

204 countries, 805 Islands, 7 seas, 7+ Billion people and I’m still single🤭🤭#funny #jokes

You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. And, You also tell me you love me, so now I’m scared😟😟#funny #jokes

My teacher today gave a 45-minute speech about not wasting time.😅😅#funny #jokes

Always wear cute pajamas to bed you'll never know who you will meet in your dreams. ☺️☺️#funny #jokes

My father always told me, find a job you love and you'll never have to work a day in your life.#funny #jokes

When I'm on my death bed, I want my final words to be 'I left one million dollars in the.#funny #jokes

My study period = 15 minutes. My break time = 3 hours🤭🤣 #funny #jokes

Here my dad comes on whatsapp... From now on my status would be '***no status***' or just a smiley... #funny #jokes

My biggest concern in life is actually how my online friends can be informed of my death...#funny #jokes😅😅